opposites unite

Opposites attract. Everyone knows that old adage, and many times it rings true in our lives. I think it’s especially true when it comes to couples. I find it completely awesome how many couples could not be more opposite in personality, preferences, gifts, and talents, yet they enjoy a lovely balance in their relationships. It’s definitely the case in my marriage. I am a flighty extrovert, while my man is a sober-minded introvert. I process verbally. He processes silently. I’m all city-girl, he could live on the side of a mountain forever. It’s a beautiful paradox, but in certain areas, it makes things a bit complicated.

For example, serving others is a central part of our life as followers of Christ. But since we’re wired so differently, one of the things that my husband and I have always found difficult is exactly where and how to serve others together.  He prefers practical, behind-the-scenes ways of helping folks. He wants a task to accomplish on behalf of someone to meet a need they have. I prefer to get all up in the mix with the people… seeing their faces, hearing their stories, feeling their emotions, making a connection so they know they’re important. That’s what thrills my heart.

Scripture reminds us of the fact that we’re all wired so beautifully different on purpose.

There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord.  There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work. -1 Corinthians 12:4-6

Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. -1 Corinthians 12:12

Over the years Todd and I have served others together in various ways, but they have undoubtedly been more slanted toward one of our worlds than the other. We’ve just made the decision to bend toward each others’ direction in order to be able to serve together. And while all of those things have been good, we hadn’t quite found that thing, that one cause that we both would passionately jump behind and could feel like we’re both in the right place with. Something that serves the poor, the downtrodden, the desperate heart. Something that allows both of us to use our very different gifts to show God’s love to people in practical and personal ways. Something that we’d both be excited about and be able to dig into with fervor, working in sync to accomplish one goal.

We’ve been glad to step into each other’s world from time to time just to be able to serve together, and many times we’ve simply served folks apart from one another in our own ways in different directions, and those things have been good too. And we will probably always have that to some extent. But we’ve had many conversations over the years about what our “one thing” might be and we kept dreaming that someday we just might find it.

Then the other night, it happened. We were having a conversation about human trafficking, as he had just returned from a men’s event centered on the subject. He was giving me the run-down of the evening, then he said it. It was unexpected, and it made my heart skip a beat.

“I think this is our one thing.”

Whoa. Say again??? I was all “really!?” and “seriously!?”  like a kid reacting to her parents telling her they were going on a trip to Disney World.

We went on to have this amazing talk about how fighting human trafficking is all about serving the underdog… people who have been used and abused to the worst extent, shunned and misunderstood by society instead of getting the true help they’ve needed. Both of our hearts go out to them in every way. Both of our hearts twist up in anger at the injustice of one human being viewing another as property and a commodity to be sold. We talked about our skill sets and gifts and how they could mesh to drum up awareness and resources to combat the problem, and how it would be awesome to go on outreach together to let people know that they are loved and there’s a way out. There are many ways to help that require lots of the things we’re each good at doing. There are tasks to be accomplished and people to encourage. It’s a perfect fit for both of us.

It was music to my ears hearing him say that the thing that I’ve become so passionate about and that he has supported so selflessly over the past few years, is now becoming our thing.

I am so, so thankful for the ways that God has worked in both of us in the last decade. He never ceases to amaze me by doing the impossible, like placing his love into the hearts of a selfish woman and a cynical man so they can work together to help bring freedom to more of the people He loves. I can’t ask for anything more lovely.

the best kind of debt-free

Thinking in crisp, clear thought today about the center of my life, who used to be despised, rejected, misunderstood, hated, and ridiculed by me on a daily basis. Thinking of how he gave up everything for me. How he suffered for me. How he died in my place.

Who do I love that much? For whom would I voluntarily be disgraced, spit upon, beaten, despised, ridiculed, tortured, even killed? Anyone? I can think of a few people who I love enough to throw myself in front of a bus without a moment’s hesitation if I thought it would save their life. Just a few. But would I do that for someone who hated me? Would I do that for someone who said I was an imbecile? Would I do that for someone who had disgraced me and everything I stood for? Very doubtful.

But that’s what He did. He paid the debt and offered new life. For me and for all of us.

ALL of us.

“Praise the One who paid my debt, and raised this life up from the dead.”

Loving Princess Leia

Hey y’all… This month’s One Word post is sitting over at my friend Marla’s blog. She is a fantastic lady and an awesome, no-pretense writer. We met online, then in real life when I realized she lived very close. (Lucky me!) I appreciate the opportunities she’s given me to share through her blog from time to time.

She’s got a series going on this month called Real. Hard. Love. With February usually being all about ooey gooey romantic love, she and some of her friends share about the part of love that we normally don’t talk about… The very very hard part. But that’s also the real part. This post that I’ve written to share over there is about perhaps one of the most difficult parts of love for me to ever talk about… Loving my own mess. Loving myself now even though that old self still clings onto me. Through this, I’m learning that loving myself as part of God’s creation actually allows me to step into the roles God has made for me with the authority He’s given me. It’s been an awesome discovery so far! I encourage you today to think about the things you’re shying away from that you know God has nudged you to do. Why haven’t you done them? Maybe you have a type of Princess Leia in your life…

Loving Princess Leia

even flunkies are loved

Let me just start by saying that I’m a devotional flunkie. Totally and completely.

So when you hear me say “I read the coolest thing in my devotional this morning…” please know that you should in no way picture me up at 4am, sitting quietly in the dining room, hands folded, with my thick bible open alongside a page of notes and my leather-bound, well-worn daily devotional in front of me, from which I’ve faithfully read and studied every day of my life.

Um….Not so much.

The picture probably looks a little more like this: I’m standing in the bathroom brushing my teeth with one hand, at the same time trying to keep my bed-head hair out of the Sonic toothbrush, while scrolling the verse of the day on my phone.

Yeah, I’m pretty lame when it comes to consistently reading from one devotional or reading plan. I have tried it many times in the past. There have been times when I’ve done pretty well. It’s a great thing. But since the fact is that I am almost certainly a person walking around with undiagnosed ADD, it’s really hard to stick with the same thing over and over day in and day out.

Now before you get all crazy on me and write letters to the church saying that the elder’s wife (the mouthy one, no less) just confessed on the Internet that she doesn’t read the bible, just chill for a sec. I didn’t say anything about not reading God’s word. That I can stick with, no problem. It’s always in front of my eyes, it’s just that the format is constantly changing.

No matter how it gets into my eyes, I’d love to say that every single time I read anything from God’s word, it hits me like a rock and transforms something else about me and brings me joy and healing and hope. Many times it does. Yet other times it sits there, hanging on me like a lightweight t-shirt, just waiting to be layered upon to shore up my skin from the cold that I don’t know is yet to come.

Very recently it’s been like that. The words just lightly resting until something more is added to them…something more that makes things click together like puzzle pieces. Lately some of those puzzle pieces have been snapping together left and right, and it’s been so cool.

But I’ve also been fighting this personality of mine. SO hard. Moreso than usual.  My ADD-ish tendency to become distracted by the least little bit of something off to the side has been bothering me, nagging at me to straighten up. I’ve felt worthless because I haven’t been able to do a lot of things well (were we ever even meant to do a lot of things well?) and because I am not sure which thing to give most of my attention to, because they are all, after all, good things. But good can easily become the enemy of the best, so I’ve been struggling for clarity that just didn’t seem to come.

Then today, I read the coolest thing in my devotional. (Insert funky picture of me reading and brushing my teeth at the same time here)

“Keep your focus on me. I have gifted you with amazing freedom, including the ability to choose the focal point of your mind. Only the crown of my creation has such remarkable capability; this is a sign of being made in My image.”

Wow. The amazing freedom of being able to choose my focal point. That’s one version of freedom I had not yet contemplated!

Further on, I read:

“Let the goal of this day be to bring every thought captive to Me. Whenever your mind wanders, lasso those thoughts and bring them into My Presence.. ….Confused ideas are untangled while you rest in the simplicity of My peace. I will guard you and keep you in constant peace when you focus your mind on Me.”

For the millionth time, my Creator spoke right to me with what I need to keep going. I have been asking the right question, what is it I need to focus on?  But I wasn’t looking for the answer that came. I have a list of things that I think are important enough to warrant my time and energy, and I’d been giving God a multiple-choice quiz of sorts, asking Him to fill in the bubble next to the thing I should be most focused on. But God doesn’t fill in our multiple-choice bubbles. He writes His own questions and answers.

So the answer He wrote for me is the answer I suspect I’ll get for most of my questions: Press into Me… Focus on Me. It’s only when you’re focused on Me that I can take care of all the peripherals for you.

I’ve spent more time in prayer over the past few weeks than I have in a while. I’m slowly getting those layers added…those pieces that complete the puzzle. The fears I’ve long held to that kept me from really opening up my hands and saying “just take everything, God” are slowly dissipating. Apparently being a devotional flunkie doesn’t make me a total flunk-out after all. He always finds a way to speak to me. When I focus my mind and thoughts on the One who created me, many of the questions I have get answered in amazing ways. I’ve got butterflies in my stomach just waiting to see what’s coming up next.

“Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.” -Proverbs 4:25

 

One word: Press

Oh, 2013, you are already moving too fast for me. Wayyyyy too fast. We are just near the end of the first month of our brand-spankin’ new year, and my hair is already a mess from the wind kicked up by the time that’s rushing by! What to do? Focus.

A couple of weeks ago when I was catching up on Melanie’s blog, I started reading about the One Word idea for the new year. I liked the idea of choosing just one word to focus on throughout the year. Just one word to refer back to in order to see if things were lining up with the vision I have for this year. I saw some great ideas already posted over there, many words such as faith and trust and hope and similarly inspiring words. Many words that assume a specific posture, such as relax, rest, or rejuvenate. Some had a punch of symbolism behind them, such as freedom or change or new.

I wanted a cool word like that. One that sang of inspiration and let everyone know what my year was going to be all about. But I didn’t get that.

Instead, I got a weird word: Press

Um, excuse me??

Press. It kept coming up in front of me in many different ways during the weeks when I was thinking and praying about my one word. I didn’t like it. It sounded busy. It sounded like I’ll be straining for something. It sounded like I’ll be lifting weights. I didn’t like it much, so I kept on searching for my word.

Then I read a familiar passage in Philippians 3 and it started making sense:

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Press. Press on. Press on toward the things that God has called me to. Press through the excuses and the laziness. Press through the mundane to finish what I started. Press through the crowd of folks with expectations and unsolicited advice. Press past the idea that I am just too much. Press into the Father for wisdom, peace, and the strength to do all this.

Like most people, I have a lot of things I’d like to do this year. Things I’d like to change and accomplish. But instead of making a long list of resolutions, I’m just looking at this one word: Press. This word makes a lot of sense for me in many distinct ways. It’s a multi-tasking word. It’s weird. And it’s perfect.

So, feel free to check in on me. Ask me how it’s going. Challenge me. Press me for the truth. And check out a few (hundred) of the other folks who have focused on one word for 2013 here and here.

PS: Thank you, Melanie, for this awesome little graphic! You’re the best, girl!

The Water Weight Challenge!

Omagoodness….. I’m super excited about something new starting this week. My husband and occasionally come up with little ideas that are just on the edge of crazy. This newest one is part motivation and accountability for our own health goals, and part fundraiser to dig wells for people across the globe who don’t have fresh water to drink.

It’s called The Water Weight Challenge.

It’s no secret that it can be tough to stay motivated just because we say we want to do something, like exercising more or losing weight. But when we link our goals to something bigger, there’s usually a better chance that we’ll stay on track. So what if those fitness goals that we set for ourselves at the beginning of the new year had a little extra motivation attached to them? What if by meeting our goals to make ourselves healthier, we could actually help make others lives healthier too?? Well, we can! Here’s the deal….

We each set a goal to exercise ___ times each week, and/or lose ___ pounds each week.

For every hour/mile/pound we reach, we set aside $1 to donate.

At the end of each month, we donate the money we’ve raised to dig fresh water wells in India. Simple.

My church, the Grove City Vineyard, has partnered with a ministry in India for decades, and together we’ve dug wells all over that country. Many people, whose children were drinking contaminated water and dying of things that are completely preventable, now have clean, healthy water to drink, all because of the faithfulness of people like you, who are each willing to do a little part to add up to something big. Donations will be made directly to Grove City Vineyard, who directs the funds to India where the wells will be dug.

Think about your fitness goals for this year. Maybe you want to exercise an hour a day. Perhaps you’re thinking of setting a goal to lose 2 lbs each week. Or it could be as simple as deciding to take a short walk at your lunch hour each day. Any of these goals are healthy ones, and although they wouldn’t cost us much to donate $1 for each one, they can add up quickly.

Here’s an example of what could happen in just the first 12 weeks:

• One person donates $1 for each hour they exercise. They meet their goal of exercising 6 days per week. They’ve raised $72 in 12 weeks. Doesn’t seem like much??
• If 35 people meet this same goal, we’d raise $2520 in 12 weeks. It costs about $2500 to dig a well. We each just donated $6 a week (less than the cost of lunch at Wendy’s or two Starbucks coffees) and together we provided clean water to an entire village of people. It only took us 12 weeks. They now have clean water FOREVER.

WOW. Little things can make a BIG impact. I’ll be sharing the Facebook page where you can join the challenge soon.

Let’s join together, taking small steps to do something big.

Krysten

learning in the last 365

What can I say about the last 365 days??  A LOT. That’s the problem. So much I’ve been wanting to say about this year and not nearly enough time to sit down and get it all out. As I’ve looked back at what the past 365 days have been about, I’ve had a hard time putting any sort of rhyme, reason, or theme to it. There has been a lot of hurt and a lot of healing. But mostly a lot of learning.

I’ve learned that a person who has given himself over to substances that manipulate the mind actually becomes just a shell of his former self. He stunts his own growth, mentally, physically, spiritually. I’ve also learned that God will meet that person right in the middle of the filthiest place he takes himself, look him in the face and ask: “are you done yet?” I’ve seen God’s redemptive work before, lots of times. In my life and in the lives of many others. But this year, I got to see his resurrection power at work. It’s been so beautiful.

I’ve learned that your family isn’t just the people you share blood with. Sometimes they’re the ones that treat you least like family. But that’s okay. Because God made us not for family, but for community, and that can happen anywhere, whether or not you share blood or last names.

I’ve learned that just a small step of obedience can set us on a path of big impact. Such as been my experience this year. I don’t pretend to believe that my little contributions will solve the world’s problems, or even one problem. But I know that we’re all responsible for fitting our pieces of the puzzle into the overall picture. And sometimes we just stand there because we can’t see what the big picture is supposed to be. Instead of trying to fit some of the pieces together, we think it’s best to just wait until someone else–someone more qualified or wise or “together,” perhaps–gets all the edges matched up, then we’ll be able to help a little with the rest. But sometimes we just need to do something to get started, then we can see how our contribution helps the whole thing come together.

I’ve learned that some traditions just die with people.

I’ve learned that no matter how little I think I have, I am so ridiculously, terribly rich.

I’ve learned that “Whatever your work is, do it gladly. Do it as you would do it unto the Lord and not for people” is harder to live out than I thought.

I’ve learned that while I can be pretty generous with my stuff, I haven’t quite learned not to be stingy with my time. (Jesus, work on that one, please??)

I’ve learned that I feel most “right” when I am creating something.

I’ve learned that there truly is such a thing as God’s Economy, where people just use what they have for the good of others, and just receive just what they are in need of. And it just works.

I’ve learned that garbage in really does = garbage out. That goes for what I see, hear, think, eat, and surround myself with. The good news is that the flip side of that is also true. Yay.

I’ve learned that having too many things on my plate usually means none of them are done well, and that I need to remember my first and foremost responsibilities, then let everything else fit in around those things (or not).

And maybe most of all, as you’d expect, I’ve learned that I still have a whole, big lot to learn.